I have been noticing as I’m getting older – no – let me rephrase that. I am noticing as my HUSBAND is getting older – that his driving is getting more and more creative. Yes. That’s the word. Creative.
For example: We were turning onto a street from a shopping center going at a constant rate of speed appropriate for turning into traffic. I was secure and proceeded to check my emails on my iPhone – when all of a sudden I glanced up as I noticed my husband accelerating to the upcoming RED light! I was curious, mind you – like any passenger would be (and a little concerned for my personal safety) as he was NOT slowing down – but going toward that light at an alarming speed! But just like a man (of a certain age) he had misjudged the light turning green and had to SLAM on the brakes – or so it seemed to me. He has another story – something about having to go at the rate of the traffic on the road. Hmmmm. I didn’t see any of them speeding up to the red light – only our car – leaving everyone IN THE DUST and me with a very worried and stunned expression on my face. You know the ‘look’. It’s the one where the mouth opens – but no sound comes out. Yeah – that one. When I do this ‘look’ – Greg is quick to tell me that I’m going to catch flies like that. The nerve.
Now I realize that his erratic driving may just be a perception. It IS possible that I’m starting to ‘lose it’. It wouldn’t be the first time I felt like I was. I’ve raised two teenagers for goodness sakes. And sometimes I really fear that my grasp on reality is slipping away. But I do not EVER drive this way – nor do I remember him driving that way in all the years I’ve known him. He’s always been a very safe driver – much more aggressive at the wheel than me – of course – but still very safe and reliable. I could fall asleep in the car while we were going somewhere and feel perfectly safe. Now I keep my eyes open – mostly in a wide-eyed stare – but they are still open.
Perception. My perception. It’s different from yours. I view the world through a different lens than you. The problem comes when I think that you should see things the way that I do – when you don’t. Or try to get my husband to see that he shouldn’t be speeding up to a red light – but he should allow plenty of time to put his brakes on (and make me feel more safe). But his perception of the incident is entirely different from mine.
Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone could just think like me – or do things just like me? I wouldn’t have to guess at why things happen between friends – worry about what others are thinking – and wouldn’t be concerned at the actions of others. Unfortunately life isn’t like this – it’s full of ‘give and take’ with the people in my world – making adjustments and allowances everyday with things I just can’t understand.
I have to believe that God made us this way on purpose. We don’t understand everything and we’re not suppose to. I don’t understand even the closest people to me and why they think like they do – and life is full of navigating around that. Different opinions – different preferences – different perceptions.
The older I get – the more I realize this: It’s not important that I understand everything – I know now I never will. But it is important to have an open mind for others – to accept and embrace change in my life and realize that I am not the only one in this universe. To accept that I am not the only one with an opinion or perception of fact. And to learn to navigate through all the ‘junk’ of youth and inexperience to where I finally get to a place where – that’s okay. Even if it means getting very used to speeding up to red lights. Even then. I guess. After all – this is how I perceive it.