Musings From A Musical Mind

Breaking Silence

Broken

Image by PurpleGecko via Flickr

Living a ‘Christ led’ life has many challenges – and always has.  In the midst of these complications are people – different from ourselves that we are trying to do life with. Those that we take into our lives, learn to love – but often disagree with – then because of a cross word or other situation, we find ourselves removed from them.

The early church had a problem with forgiveness and superiority in general.  They learned to be critical of anyone different and felt justified in doing so. Jews felt superior to the Greek – Men felt superior to women – etc.  It is a very old song.  Grace, unity, forgiveness, justice, judgement.  Who should give it – and why?  Is anyone really qualified to do this?  Are you more spiritual than I am?  What makes you feel this way?  Should we ever forgive something unforgivable?  Why or why not?  Are there things that cannot be forgiven?

I would love to live in a place where being a Christian means that I actually can accept you just the way you are – not try to make you into something that will make  you acceptable.  Where I can forgive you just as easily as you can forgive me.  No matter what the problem was – bad behavior, inappropriate situation, or other messy circumstance.  I would love to not live in fear that  somewhere along the line – I will be judged by those who feel  they are better or more spiritual than I am.   Especially when I have blown it – or do not follow all the rules of conduct when it comes to accepting people into my life.  And especially when someone has hurt me – and I know I have hurt them – but I have chosen to forgive them and seek them out for reconciliation – because it’s the right thing to do.  When I was the one who was wrong.  But even when I wasn’t.

I am weary of those that would say that silence is best in some situations.  Really?

Silence holds hostage and punishes like a physical pain.

Hope and reconciliation are a part of God’s redemptive plan.  It is not weak to want to restore – and not naive to expect that it can happen.  Silence should never be a part of forgiveness – no matter what you may have been told.  Especially in those situations where true friendship lived and breathed.  Those that have a relationship with Jesus and have been forgiven much.  Those that have loved us and know that we still love them.

Make peace with those as long as it is in your power to do so.  Forgive and you will be forgiven.  Love in such a way that it will put other Christians to shame.  Do something crazy – let go of your pride and reputation – and actually start over – fresh and with a new purpose.  Not caring what others may say or how they may judge you.  While there is still life – there is hope.  And we are called to do this.  It is a “God moment”  – a Holy calling.

We need to be gracious in love – just like Jesus was gracious with us.  Today my friend Tony called it “Furious Love”.   And we all need a little of that, don’t we?

I am praying for you – that you would grab ahold of all that God has for you – that silence will be broken in your life – that you would have no fear in love.  With God – all things are possible and all things can be made new.  Forgive – break the silence and experience God’s “furious love” first-hand.

When was the last time you had someone turn away from you because of a misunderstanding or disagreement?  Has silence been a weapon and a barricade for not really forgiving and dealing with it?  Or were you able to  resolve it?   Are you still working on it?

 

God Bless

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Comments on: "Breaking Silence" (10)

  1. […] Breaking Silence (cindyholman.wordpress.com) […]

  2. This is the Achilles heel of the Church (body) today. There is so much conflict, disagreements, negligence, etc. It’s almost like we can’t find common ground. I think the heart of the matter is that we are too proud. We run against the words of Christ to deny oneself, take up that cross and follow Him. If we really lived by denying ourselves we would find common ground and would change the world. Forgiveness, hope, love, faith are the cornerstones of our faith. Yet, those are the ones that we struggle with the most.

    I long for the day when the church is of “one mind” again. That’s certainly not what we see today.

    • Wouldn’t that be great, Moe? I long for that day too. I don’t know why we let our stupid selfish pride get in the way of forgiving and just getting on with life – but it is complicated for some people. I wish it was not so – and I know I need to make allowances for them – but it is not easy. It seems so junior high to me.

  3. I think it depends upon the situation. Silence when used as a weapon is like anything else used as a weapon. However, if you find a toxic person in your life, someone who has proven to be a bad influence or cause your family pain, silence can very well be the answer. Knowing the difference takes discernment and prayer.

    • Well no one likes having a toxic person around – but my prayer would be that a Christ centered individual – that is open to the Holy Spirit working and breathing in their life – would be able to leave that toxic/dark side behind in an effort to be more like Jesus. Possible? Yes. Probable for some? No. That’s just sad to me. I know my husband has often chided me in this issue. He says, “you don’t want a person back in your life that is going to confuse you or be a bad influence – or make you feel sorry for them – use you and mistreat you – and then because of the “victim mentality” try to punish you by silence and self-righteous crap – it’s better to just let them go” That’s hard for me to accept – that not everyone is redeemable – not everyone is worth it to take a chance on again – that not everyone is deserving to be in my world. But he is right.

  4. Well said, Cindy. Silence usually is used as punishment for a lot of things. When one party is silent, the other is wondering and what they come up with oftentimes is not what the silent one wants. We need to talk more and. . . listen more. I like the start over part, too. It’s the “not caring what others may say or how they may judge you” that’s difficult. I’m not as sensitive to it as I used to be, but I fall prey to it every now and then.

    • Thanks Carla – you know – you’re right. Often times the one withholding is thinking that they are teaching a lesson with their silence – only to learn much later that it did the opposite and just encouraged misunderstanding and pity. Not exactly what the withholder was looking for. I feel sorry for those who choose not to listen, forgive and understand. And it’s very easy to feel judged – I know that’s happened to me when trying to reach out to a lost friend who I had hurt and who had hurt me in ways I’m sure that were not meant – and some that were. I would give anything to have a conversation and set some things straight – but mostly just stop the silence.

  5. “Do something crazy – let go of your pride and reputation – and actually start over – fresh and with a new purpose. Not caring what others may say or how they may judge you.”

    I love that line. This is such a convicting post, and definitely thought provoking – and challenging!

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