Musings From A Musical Mind

The city of Burbank, CA looking east from Univ...

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This month marks the 30th anniversary of the last time I was single and living at home.  I went right from my parent’s home at 20 years of age to another way of life – without ever have lived on my own.

And although it worked out for me – I also see great benefits to living on your own before being married.

Both of my children have had opportunities to live on their own after finishing high school.  And although this can be hard, financially – I believe the lessons learned while living on your own are very valuable.  Some things just can’t be taught while living at home.

With our daughter – she was so determined that she would make it – and it took two jobs for her to do so – she’s been very proud of herself that she was completely self sufficient by the time she was 20 years old.  She learned a lot of about room-mates and finances that she’s never forgotten – and when it came time for her to get married – she was already very disciplined with money and her work ethic.  She’s one of the hardest working young women I know.

Shawn, who will be 20 in October – has moved to California to pursue a music education and hopefully a career with his music training.  He lives with room-mates in Burbank and has struggled to maintain his rent with only a part-time job.  We are grateful he got a job, when so few are available.  And we’re also thankful that his loan money will cover his tuition AND his housing this fall.  But it’s still tough to make the rent and pay for things like food – until then.

Experiences like this are so valuable.  And he will look back on these times as “the good old days” before real bills, a wife and children to support.  All of this – priceless in the big scheme of things to come.

As I chatted on the phone with him last night – I reminded him that this too shall pass – and his present circumstance is what great songs and writings are made of  🙂  Maybe not while he’s struggling – but sometime after as he looks back…

Living “in the moment” – trying to be present – even during hard times of struggle. Being available in the mind.  On purpose and on task.  Learning to get by on very little – to be engaged and still positive about life.  This is what living “in the moment” is all about.

Are you alway “in the moment”?  Does your mind wander to “better times” either in the past – or somewhere in the future?  Can you be content and very present?  Now – today?  Especially when things are not ideal?  And you may be struggling?  Can you find the priceless of the here and now?  Knowing this moment will pass you by – and be no more?

Did you live on your own before you were married?  What did you do without during those years?  What’s your story?


God Bless

Comments on: "Priceless “In The Moment” Moments" (8)

  1. Lived on my own for two months before getting married.

  2. Yes, I lived alone before I was married. I think it helped a lot. My husband didn’t. He went right from his folks home to the Army and then marriage. He never had that “alone” experience. Do I wallow in the past? Sometimes. Do I project into the future? Sometimes. Can I stay in the present? Yes, I can. I may not like it, but I know how to do it, even when things are tough. What other choice do we have? Most of us have learned that things do not go away just ‘cuz you ignore them. My one son went to college for a time and now he’s home, working to get more funds for school. He knows how to be self-sufficient. My other son is now a US Marine. He will be graduating in June and heading to Parris Island a week later. He’s just learning about checking accounts, debit cards, budgeting and the like. I’m sure the Marines will teach him what I may forget. 🙂

    • I think it makes a difference – I can relate to your husband on that one for sure! Yes – staying in the present is the most difficult for sure!!

  3. I’m like you, Cindy. I went from living with my parents and college graduation to getting married. My dd has always been very independent. She’s 21 and, not only has she been on her own for three years, but usually quite far from home. She goes to college 1800 miles away, has a been a Russian exchange student for a semester half way around the world where folks have a very different culture, government, and language. Recently she got back from two weeks in Israel. She even traveled across the country twice before she ever graduated from high school. I think it has given her a great deal more perspective, experience and confidence than I ever had.

  4. I’ve learned along my road of life that tough times are all relative. My tough times in todays terms would have destroyed me at an early age, and I had real life struggles, the kind books could be written about.

    As we live through more economic tough times now, God has given me a better understanding of these kind of situations, due to the storms He’s already brought me threw.

    I’m actually in the middle of writing a blog right now on this very subject, I’ll publish in a couple of weeks. The point is this; sometimes the best things that happen to people turn out to be the worst things that happen to people. In reverse, the worst things that happen to people often are the best things that could ever happen to them. A-men?

    • Yes I’m finding more and more that you and I really think alike – and no doubt have made some of the same discoveries along the way 🙂 Can’t wait to read your blog now!

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