Musings From A Musical Mind

Archive for the ‘High School’ Category

A Touch Of Nostalgia

Yes that’s me.  My senior picture taken in the summer of 1978 for my year of graduation – 1979.

This morning I received an invitation on facebook from a former high school class mate – to join “schoolFeed” a website somewhat like “Classmates.com”.  Naturally I was curious and was surprised to see many people I recognize (well, at least I recognize their names) from high school.  It is a website that allows you to post pictures, interest, bio and stats, including a senior photo – so others can tell it’s really you.

I’ve never been too interested in this kind of stuff before – because frankly – I keep in touch with those I want to and have never sought out the others I did not have relationship with past high school.   Usually for most of us, high school is a time of dark murky waters of self-consciousness and humiliation – mixed in with some of the best times of our lives.  For me – an old boyfriend or two has a tendency to pop up on sites like this and although amusing – it’s sometimes better to leave the past in the past.  Heartbreaks and relationship issues – especially in high school are dicey at best.

My good times in high school revolve around my musical and dramatic involvement – NOT the academic arena.  In fact – I can hardly remember what I learned back them – don’t remember ever having homework but managed to pull “A’s” and “B’s” in most classes.  But I remember almost every play I was involved in and every piece of music I sang in our concert and Jazz choir.

But when I look back on high school  – it is not with all fondness.  It was an age of awkwardness, not being sure enough of myself – to really be myself and mostly a time of great regret for me personally.  As one of the few Christians in my high school – I know I could have spoken up more – and tried to make more of a difference, but I didn’t.  I know I did not handle a couple of situations in the right way.  Who really acts in a grown-up way before the age of 18?  But still – it is something I think about.

I have this weird recurring dream too.  I’m back in high school – can’t remember my locker combination – can find my class, etc.  When I finally do find a schedule for classes – I’m in one (after roaming the halls forever)  too late in the quarter and don’t have any idea what they’re talking about – and there’s a real possibility I won’t graduate.  Now in the light of day this is a silly dream (if there really is such a thing)  I not only graduated, but went on to be a college graduate as well.

The only explanation that Greg and I have ever been able to come up with is this:

Somewhere deep down – I have the feeling of “unfinished business”.  And this is something I have never been able to shake.

So finding some of these people online whom I have not had a face-to-face conversation since 1979 – is surreal.  Gotta love facebook for bringing past people back into our present.  What we do with them is our choice.

And because we can never go back – I have to believe that those circumstances, pain and regret have made me who I am today.  Without them – I would not have learned how to handle heartbreak and regret, or to be able to find a long-lasting relationship – and know the difference.

But I do want to reconnect with those from my past that make me smile.  Those I’ve forgotten about, as they went on their way to “do life”.  Share wonderful memories of fun things we did – remember teachers and events and talking about how old and mature we thought we were.  But most of all – I would love to take what I know now about people and life in general – and walk those high school halls again, find those people whom I hurt and who hurt me – and make things right in person.

What are your best and worst high school memories?  Do you like connecting with others from your past?  What would you do if you could go back with what you know now?

God Bless

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Let’s Go

The Cars, 1984. L-R: Benjamin Orr, Greg Hawkes...

Image via Wikipedia

Here is another blast from the past.  It’s “The Cars” in one of my favorite songs from 1979 – the year of my graduation from high school 🙂

When I listen to this song – I am transported back in time to another place and situation – driving down the road and thinking life was very serious – and at 18 IT IS!

Enjoy a little nostalgia today – this song will make you smile 🙂

God Bless

Graduation, Parties and Reflections

So today – we celebrated my son graduating from high school – he officially graduates on Tuesday to receive his diploma and wear his cap and gown – but since it is only a formality at this point in time – to us it is a ‘done deal’.  And so we celebrate.

I remember my own graduation from high school.  I was the emotional one in my high school class – and not too excited about leaving high school – I was happy there and very involved with the music program – Concertones and Jazz Choir and also pretty involved in drama.  I had friends and a former boyfriend I knew I would never see again once high school was over and was not anxious for that thought.  Some of my ‘guy friends’ bought me a box of kleenex as a joke and I found it in the music room with a note ‘for Cindy’ written on it as our class was lining up to take our ‘walk’ as graduates.  The year was 1979 – and the day was not much

My Senior Picture

different from today was.  Sunny and mostly warm – no rain and that meant we could have the ceremony out on our football field.  Our choir sang – I cried all the way through it – as we sang “Notes from Paul”.  I remember going to the “Top of the Inn” with my boyfriend and both our families after graduation.  The relationship I had with that guy didn’t last much past high school – but it was a special if not emotional day for me – I do remember that.

So much has changed – and now my ‘baby’ is graduating.  I don’t feel too much different from the way I felt 31 years ago this month.  It’s funny – when you’re graduating from high school – you feel so old and mature.  You don’t realize it is just the beginning of your life in so many ways.  Still so much growing up to do – so many things to experience – so much of life still to come.  I’m not sure what things are coming their way for my son – but if he’s anything like me – he will learn it mostly through life experience and not so much what people tell him.  He will make his own reflections some day – and perhaps become a musician and a writer like me – and look back on the day he graduated as a stepping stone to another place – and a new beginning for him.

Life changes so much for us from the time we’re 18 to when we’re parents and then onward to midlife.  Our perspective changes as life ‘happens’ to us – and sometimes the things we believed and held so tightly to – slip away from us.  And sometimes we find out things that we didn’t believe – are suddenly thrust upon us.  Sometimes life is gentle and kind – sometimes it is not.  We encounter those who make life better and easier for us – and those that hinder us and make life difficult.  It is through all of these experiences that we learn as each is something new and unique to our separate ‘journey’ through life.   We find that not everyone can go with us on some of that ‘journey’.  Sometimes we need to find the strength to take step toward our future – on our own – with no one beside us except the Lord Jesus Himself.  And if we let Him lead and guide us through that path ahead of us – we find we’re never really alone.  It is those times that shape our character and help us make it through the tough times of pain, conflict and heartache that is ahead of us.  There is also deep joy in trusting your life to your creator – and know that He holds you and won’t let you go.  And that nothing will be too hard to encounter with His help and guidance to make it through.  It is a wonderful thing to discover what your God-given talents and gifts are – and then to be able to use them to the best of their ability.  There is no greater joy than to find what you were designed to do – find someone who loves you for you – and to love them back – no matter what storms may come into your path.  To experience the love and grace of the Lord through those storms – and those victories – the deepest valleys and the highest mountains of your existence – the good and the bad – the ugly and the beautiful – and to feel safe – ah….the greatest feeling in the world.

Here is wishing you and yours a wonderful season of love and great reflections.

God Bless

27 Years Ago

In this season of graduations – I thought I would share our graduation picture from Northwest University – formally Northwest College – in the spring of 1983.  Both my Son Shawn, and Son-in-law Drew are graduating from High School and University, respectively this spring.  Good times, good times.  I remember it was about 95 degrees the day we graduated and I could feel the sweat dripping down my front and back – I was wearing a brand new dress under that robe and back “in the day” the graduations used to be in the gymnasium and the room was HOT!!!

Hope you are building memories today with your family and friends.

God Bless!

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