Musings From A Musical Mind

Archive for the ‘lost’ Category

Lost

I have been lost many times. Not because it is fun but because I have no sense of direction. At all.

Usually this happens in the car while driving somewhere. Sometimes I don’t even have to be in the car – but just looking for it.

When my children were small I got lost driving places all the time. Before cell phones I would get exasperated and finally pull to the side of the road and feel like having a good cry, but usually I stopped myself because the kids were in the car and I wanted them to believe that I could do anything even be strong and get them anywhere we needed to go. But they knew the truth. I was simply and hopelessly lost.

In one such comical moment when living in Fort Worth, Texas – I was driving with 5-year-old Ashlee in the pouring rain. We were on the freeway, I missed my exit and was really lost. I remember feeling so annoyed and a little scared too – I mean where in the world was I anyway? I even enlisted the help of my 5-year-old and said, “Ashlee please help me read those blasted signs!” To which she replied, “Mom – I can’t read” Oh yeah – details.

Fast forward to the mid-nineties when we had our first cell phones. I was a sales director in training in those days and did much of my business on the phone while commuting between Kirkland where we lived – and Renton where we went to church. In those days it was not against the law to talk on a cell phone while you drove so I got much done that way with my sales calls. One time because I hate to drive on the freeway in the rain – I chose to take a “back way” home. I got lost. Again. I called Greg from where I was and couldn’t even tell him where I was so the cell phone couldn’t help me!

Fast forward again to the present – where I now own an iPhone with navigational ability. Yeah for me! Yeah for progress! Except….when the maps on the iPhone takes me a “back way” just because – and l end up in a neighborhood that looks nothing like the neighborhood I’m supposed to be in! It was someplace I had been before, but not for 2 years. I thought the map would direct me so I didn’t take along the directions. I was hot, tired and in a bad mood after trying to follow to the letter – the step by step instructions on the map app. Daisy my 8 month old puppy was along for the “easy” drive and gave up on being patient 30 minutes previous to me finally pulling along the side of the road. I thought to myself, “this can’t be happening to me again” and was not a bit funny as I found myself wanting to cry. How silly, I thought. Who cries over being lost? I guess I do.

I called Greg and he suggested that I try mapquest or another map app – and if that didn’t work – I should just go back to the place I remember and the map app would redirect me. If he heard me whining and whimpering (just a little) he never let on. I mean – how bad could it be, right? Except for being hot and cranky and Daisy too – we were still in one piece, had less than a quarter tank of gas and no one needed to go to the bathroom. Yet. I tried the address in mapquest and a funny thing happened. It did not even recognize the address and tried to give me an alternate one. After circling around in that neighborhood a few times I finally found my way out and to the main road. I had to rely on my very bad memory and NO sense of direction to get me to the right street – but I eventually found it.

But a strange thing happened as I perused the house numbers. The house that I knew had to be the house was one number off from the address I had typed into the map app.

Oh brother.

Have you ever been really lost? What’s your story?

God Bless

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Silent Night

During exercise Joint Resolve 26, in Bosnia an...

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Just saw a true story called ‘Silent Night’ starring Linda Hamilton – set in WWII time – Germany.  It was a story from a little boy’s perspective just before the end of the war.  A German mother and her son fled to a family cabin away from their German town.  Just as they were settling in – three American soldiers broke in and used the cabin for a ‘hospital’ for a wounded soldier.  Then shortly after three German soldiers came upon the cabin.  The woman (Elisabeth) insisted that they keep their weapons outside if they were to use her cabin for shelter – calling it a ‘neutral zone’ – and amazingly THEY DID!

I was touched by this story of strength and courage from this woman – who at first feared for her life and the life of her son – but who ended up literally bringing peace and love into that small cabin  preparing a meal for them and taking care of the wounded man.  The atmosphere and influence of a warm and caring woman – was felt by all the men.  And they all changed that night.  The war was left outside for Christmas – and common ground between the men – fighting on opposite sides was discovered.  It was Christmas Eve and as Elisabeth prepared soup for the hungry men – each of them had something special to add to the meal from their rations – and one American officer even had ‘presents’ – chocolate for the young boy and young German soldier (about 15 years old) and a french soap wrapped in a little box for Elisabeth – which very much moved her.

What could have been a very tragic and bloody night for all of them – ended up being a very different night in that cabin as they exchanged words and stories with each other.  And later the young German soldier sang ‘Silent Night’ beside a modest little Christmas tree.   It was a night that Elisabeth and her son remembered for the rest of their lives.

I was thinking about this remarkable woman as I watched this.  Would I have been so brave?  Could I have brought peace into a hostile situation?  Can one person really make a difference?  Yes.  I believe they can.  I believe I can.  I believe you can too.

Are you one that brings peace in the midst of a storm?  Do you bring a calming effect to people in your world?  A healing balm?  An atmosphere of true humility and graciousness?  Do you seek out good in everyone – can you look past the ugly things – try not to blame or cast judgment?  Only think the best and try to encourage, embrace and love?

I pray that you will be one to shine your light – make difficult things better – lighten the load for others that carry a heavier burden.

After all – this is the Gospel Message.  Good News.  Great Tidings of Joy.  Jesus came to redeem, love, and win back what was lost.  You and me.

 

I am praying special blessings on you this day after Christmas!

 

God Bless

 

 

Addicted To Love

Addicted to Love (song)

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It’s so great how the ‘lost’ can be ‘found’ – if you wait long enough.  25 years ago, Greg and I were youth pastors in Jeannette, PA.  We had a small youth group – but with those eight or ten ‘kids’ we developed  deep and lasting relationships – especially with four of the boys.  They were and always will be ‘the lost boys’.  This was my pet name for them – because each one had their own unique set of circumstances and challenging home lives.  We came into their lives in that crucial part of life – when they were teenagers.

You never know how you will affect lives while you are in the middle of your own journey – or what the future impact may be.  We were just simply doing our job and it was easy to love these kids.  And with no other distractions and no children of our own yet – they became our ‘children’.

After moving away from Jeannette in ’86  – we took a position in New Castle, PA and two of the boys came to visit us.  I was pregnant with Ashlee at the time and it was so great to see them!  They told us of some trouble that one of the boys had found himself in – and we wanted to reconnect with him – even back then – but it was hard in those days with no internet.  Sadly we lost touch with all of them and some time later moved back to the west coast.  Because there was no internet yet – or at least very limited – I had no way of finding anyone – but always thought about them and wondered what had happened.  The memory of my ‘lost boys’ was always on my mind.  When we first had internet, back in the late 90’s I tried once more to locate them.  Nothing.  Years passed and I got on myspace and looked.  Nothing.  Then a few years later I got on facebook and tried again.  No luck – until….about 6 or 8 months ago.  I typed in two of the boys names and FOUND THEM!!  It was like a miracle!  I contacted them – one now lives back in Jeannette and the other is in the army and stationed in Afghanistan.  What a thrill to talk to them and catch up on their lives – there’s a whole lot to catch up – 25 years!

One of the ‘boys’ suggested that we use Skype to talk to each other using a webcam on the computer and seeing a real face in front of you while you’re talking.  We had never used it before and after a lot of bugging on his part – Greg finally downloaded Skype.  Last week we were able to call him.  I can’t tell you how it felt to see him (this was the one that had some trouble in his teens after we left) and to see that he’s all right.  During the conversation I said, ‘You know Randy – you were the original ‘lost boys’ – you were like our kids’  and without missing a beat he said, ‘Well in many ways – you were our parents’  That was so nice to hear.  That ‘lost boy’ is 40 years old now.  And he has never forgotten us.

Two of the other boys were found from this blog.  I wrote an article about a year ago – still looking for these ‘boys’ and wrote their names in an article hoping someone would see them.  Someone did.  One of the boys himself –  who was not on facebook – was using ‘google’ to find another one of these boys and my blog popped up!  He commented on the article and gave me his email.  That was amazing too!  He told me news of he and his brother and what a journey their lives had taken.  Randy and I pushed and pleaded with him to join facebook – and he finally did!

Here is a video I made for the four ‘lost boys’.  This song has much meaning – it was an ’80’s tune that played on the radio ALL THE TIME back then and Bill use to ‘sing’ parts of it and make us all laugh.  Good times, good times.

Here’s hoping that whatever  you have ‘lost’ – will someday be ‘found’.

Enjoy!

The Coloring Song

The song below is dedicated to my dear Pastor Greg who loves the group Petra.  This song is pretty cool and I remember my students singing it in chapel services over the years.  For those of you that remember when this group was popular in the 80’s you will appreciate this!

I was married in 1981 and graduated college in 1983 – right at the height of Petra’s popularity and I’m afraid like Peter confesses in the movie “Hook” that he missed the 60’s due to being an accountant – I confess to missing most of the 80’s due to being newly married – going to college full-time and then moving to Alaska for 2 years (everything is years behind up there) and then in 1987 becoming a mommy for the first time.  Yup – it is a ‘lost’ decade of music to me.  It wasn’t until much later that I actually discovered the group “Journey” and “Hall and Oates” – although I had seen MTV when it was at its most popular and had seen a few music videos (I wasn’t completely out of it) and I had David Meece, Michael W. Smith, Amy Grant and Gaither Vocal Band cassettes I used to listen to in the car.

By the time we were past the 80’s I wasn’t much in to Petra – having not been in to it when there were actually around.  But other music from that era has become something that I listen to most all of the time.  I like good music from any decade so – my list is long.

But this song below is for my pastor – who told us the story last Sunday about how someone had given him a Petra cassette while he was in the Marines.  It impacted him and began a change in him – he was not a Christian at the time.  We never know the power of music and the influence our lives will have over another person that is lost and seeking.  Sometimes you don’t have to do much at all – just be willing to share your life with others – be a light in your world.

Enjoy and God Bless!

Red is the color of the blood that flowed
Down the face of Someone Who loved us so
He’s the perfect man, He’s the Lord’s own son,
He’s the Lamb of God, He’s the only one
That can give us life, that can make us grow,
That can make the love between us flow.

Blue is the color of a heart so cold
It will not bend when the story’s told
Of the love of God for a sinful race
Of the blood that flowed down Jesus face
That can give us life, that can make us grow
That can keep our hearts from growing cold.

Gold is the color of the morning sun
That shines so freely an every one
It’s the sun above that keeps us warm
It’s the Son of love that calms the storm
That can give us life that can make us grow,
That can turn our mornings into gold.

Brown is the color of the autumn leaves
When the winter comes to the barren trees
There is birth, there is death, there is a plan
And there’s just one God, and there’s just one man
That can give us life, that can make us grow
That can make our sins as white as snow

That can give us life, that can make us grow
That can turn our mornings into gold.
That can give us life, that can make us grow
That can keep our hearts from growing cold.
That can give us life, that can make us grow
That can make the love between us flow.

Lost

So I’m at my Zumba class tonight – GREAT FUN!!  And by the time I leave – it is dark.  I parked the car – quite a ways from the front entrance – I took note of what was around me etc. and was so sure I knew where my car was.  I don’t like coming out of anyplace alone and in the dark – but at least there were many people milling around in the parking lot.  But….

Yes – you guessed it.  I couldn’t find the car.  It was funny at first – and just annoying – I mean I had really paid attention to where I had parked it – just in case…Okay – I do tend to lose my vehicle quite a bit – even in the day light – so I have to be sure to pay very close attention when I go anywhere at night.  So here I am wandering around the HUGE parking lot – filled with every vehicle imaginable.  I walked down one aisle – it looked sort of familiar – but there was no car.  So I went down the next aisle – and the same thing.  After a few minutes it wasn’t funny or annoying any more – and I wasn’t too concerned about looking like a COMPLETE DORK – Okay I was a little concerned about that – but it began to become alarming. And by alarming – I mean – all these weird things were popping  into my head like – “the car is stolen. ”  It’s pretty old – but still a nice Mazda Millennia – who knows – would someone really want it for the stereo system or something?  And since this have NEVER happened to me before – I really didn’t know what to do.  So I called Greg on my cell – and he laughed at me.  Okay – he stopped when he knew how panicked I was.  I told him I just wanted to sit down in the middle of the parking lot and cry like a baby.  Isn’t that silly?  It didn’t feel very silly.  I felt – lost.  But he assured me it probably wasn’t stolen – just misplaced for a moment.  He knew I’d find it if I walked down the middle aisle and went across – and eventually – I did.  It probably took 10 minutes – but it felt like an hour of walking around.  But it was there all along – my sweet little car – waiting for me as if to say, “I’m over here.  Over Here.  OVER HERE!!!”

Well I was relieved and WAY past feeling silly this point.  It was a “Thank you Lord” moment – so thankful that my car wasn’t stolen after all.  And that totally helpless and lost feeling was gone – in an instant.

Do you ever feel lost? Incredibly frustrated – even silly for feeling that way?  Me too.  Our lives can sometimes go this way – a little “sideways” and it can throw us off and make us feel helpless and frustrated – and all we want to do is sit down and have a good cry.  I believe that Jesus understands this about us.  I believe we will all have days and moments like this.  I believe for every bad lost “moment” – there is an even better “moment” around the corner.  A feeling of being “found” – of being valued – of being loved.

I am praying for you today.  That if you are lost – that you would indeed be found.

God Bless

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