Musings From A Musical Mind

Archive for the ‘Sons’ Category

Priceless “In The Moment” Moments

The city of Burbank, CA looking east from Univ...

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This month marks the 30th anniversary of the last time I was single and living at home.  I went right from my parent’s home at 20 years of age to another way of life – without ever have lived on my own.

And although it worked out for me – I also see great benefits to living on your own before being married.

Both of my children have had opportunities to live on their own after finishing high school.  And although this can be hard, financially – I believe the lessons learned while living on your own are very valuable.  Some things just can’t be taught while living at home.

With our daughter – she was so determined that she would make it – and it took two jobs for her to do so – she’s been very proud of herself that she was completely self sufficient by the time she was 20 years old.  She learned a lot of about room-mates and finances that she’s never forgotten – and when it came time for her to get married – she was already very disciplined with money and her work ethic.  She’s one of the hardest working young women I know.

Shawn, who will be 20 in October – has moved to California to pursue a music education and hopefully a career with his music training.  He lives with room-mates in Burbank and has struggled to maintain his rent with only a part-time job.  We are grateful he got a job, when so few are available.  And we’re also thankful that his loan money will cover his tuition AND his housing this fall.  But it’s still tough to make the rent and pay for things like food – until then.

Experiences like this are so valuable.  And he will look back on these times as “the good old days” before real bills, a wife and children to support.  All of this – priceless in the big scheme of things to come.

As I chatted on the phone with him last night – I reminded him that this too shall pass – and his present circumstance is what great songs and writings are made of  🙂  Maybe not while he’s struggling – but sometime after as he looks back…

Living “in the moment” – trying to be present – even during hard times of struggle. Being available in the mind.  On purpose and on task.  Learning to get by on very little – to be engaged and still positive about life.  This is what living “in the moment” is all about.

Are you alway “in the moment”?  Does your mind wander to “better times” either in the past – or somewhere in the future?  Can you be content and very present?  Now – today?  Especially when things are not ideal?  And you may be struggling?  Can you find the priceless of the here and now?  Knowing this moment will pass you by – and be no more?

Did you live on your own before you were married?  What did you do without during those years?  What’s your story?

 

God Bless

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Ticket To Ride

This song needs no explanation – a wonderful cover of the original Beatles tune – written by Lennon and McCartney – I love this version done by the Carpenter’s the best.  And for reasons of nostalgia – it seems the proper choice today.  I grew up with Carpenters music – and have always loved this arrangement.

If you are a fan – you will also love the rare photos of the Carpenter’s seen toward the end of this video.

My wonderful son launches into the world tomorrow morning – with a ticket in his hand – off to follow his dream.

 

Enjoy and God Bless!

This picture – was taken this year on Mother’s Day.

I think I’m gonna be sad
I think it’s today
Yeah
The boy that’s driving me mad
is going away.

He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
and he don’t care.

He said that living with me
was bringing him down
Yeah
He would never be free
when I was around.

He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
and he don’t care.

Don’t know why he’s riding so high
He oughta do right

He oughta do right by me
Before he gets to saying goodbye
He oughta do right
He oughta do right by me

I think I’m gonna be sad
I think it’s today
Yeah
The boy that’s driving me mad
is going away.

He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
He’s got a ticket to ride
and he don’t care
he don’t care.

Think I’m gonna be sad

Think I’m gonna be sad

Think I’m gonna be sad

Think I’m gonna be sad

Drops Of Jupiter

I can’t tell you why I love these song lyrics – but I identify with them somehow.    I was singing this with a voice student of mine this last week – and I asked her, “What do you think these lyrics mean?”  Interesting question, right?

I have found that the best song lyrics have a universal meaning.  And even though the writer of these words was taking something from his real life – it usually is a personal story that inspires the best songs.   This song is actually about a dream.  The lead singer of Train lost his mother to cancer and had a weird dream about missing her.   Enjoy it – it’s one of Train’s best songs and after listening to the song and seeing the lyrics – there is another video of Pat explaining about the dream and why he wrote the song.  It’s really great!

Who’s your “Drops Of Jupiter” today?  Who do you miss?

God Bless


Letters From War

Not going to lie – I cried like a baby viewing this great song sung by Mark Schultz.  And Co-written with the great Cindy Morgan one of my all time favorite artists.
This is for all you military moms out there! May all your sons and daughters –

Be Safe.

God Bless

The Queen Has Spoken

Queen's crown

Image by Sunfox via Flickr

Yes.  I am the Queen.  At least in my own home.  I’m sure no one else would grant me this distinction – but my family has no choice in the matter – and it really is true what they say, ‘If Momma ain’t happy – ain’t NOBODY happy’.  So they let me be the Queen.

Unfortunately it is in name only – as I’ve been loathe to discover, especially as of late.  The other day my car key just mysteriously disappeared off my key ring.  It couldn’t have happened at a more inconvenient time either – as my daughter and I were about to go somewhere and were under some serious time pressure.  My 19-year-old son, lost his keys somewhere at church – and ever since that happened he has been ‘borrowing’ our keys.  Now the question that I have to ask is this:  ‘why can’t he go make himself another set of keys?’  But that would be way too simple.  And we’re talking about someone who is 19.  So I ‘borrowed’ my husband’s car key for MY CAR and away we went – we couldn’t wait for Shawn to come home and give me my key.  But I was REALLY UPSET and told him he would have to deal with his father – I was OUT!  I told Greg to kill the boy and then pry my car key out of his cold dead fingers.  Greg texted back that he had buried him in a shallow grave in the backyard and that my key was safely on the counter waiting for me when I got home 🙂

Remember last year when I wrote that my car charger was missing out of MY car?  And when my son (18 years old at the time of the inquiry) came in the door – I confronted him with, ‘Where is my car charger??  You know – the one in MY CAR – that belongs to me??’  And he just looked at me calmly and said, ‘it’s in Connor’s car’ as if that settled the question once and for all – and that I was being most annoying asking.  Of COURSE it would be in Connor’s car – what was I thinking!

Well – last year revisited me on the same day my car key mysteriously disappeared – and would you believe it – it’s back in Connor’s car???  You think you’re losing a grasp of reality?  Try having a teenage son.  I can glimpse reality – and at times I think I have it almost within reach – but the more I keep trying to grab a hold of it – the more it slips away.   *sigh*

So last night I was getting ready for bed and reached for my Burt’s bees peppermint chapstick – (it’s my favorite and I’m hopelessly addicted to chapstick) and even IT WAS GONE!  I think someone is trying to mess with me.  Oh it’s not the big things – it’s all the little pesky things that don’t really matter at all – and easily replaced that will drive you nuts!

You can see that the ‘Queen’ has no real power around here – even when I fuss and fume about MY things.  I speak – no one listens.  Oh well – my boys still adore me and love to tease me – so I know I am still their number one – and that’s a good feeling.

The Queen has spoken.

God Bless

My Son

Today my baby boy is 19.

I feel like I’ve lived a whole lifetime since he was born.  Greg was pastor of a very small church in Fortuna, CA at that time.  Shortly after – Northern California had an earthquake that did considerable damage to our little town and nearby ones.  The quake happened in the middle of the afternoon while I was nursing Shawn – and four-year old Ashlee was watching TV nearby.  Our family room was a pile of junk and clothes – getting ready for an upcoming garage sale to be held that next weekend.  It created a rocking sensation and things began to come out of the cupboards and the TV ‘walked’ out of the entertainment center and almost fell on Ashlee.  It was amazing and Greg RAN from his office next door to see if we were alright.  We were – just shaken up a bit.  But in the night the after shocks were just as bad – but infant Shawn – none the wiser – slept peacefully for the first time ALL NIGHT LONG.  The quakes just lulled him to sleep.

It’s crazy what things you remember from the past – sometimes it’s the most insignificant things – the little moments that pass by so quickly.  The early bonding we had – the time we had together while he was small – I am grateful for each and every day that I got to spend with him.  I was very lucky – I was a ‘stay at  home mom‘ for both of my children and I will never regret that.

Shawn was always an easy child with a quick wit and much natural talent.  He is everyone’s friend and has that certain ‘X-factor’ that is intangible – but still just a fact that is accepted and acknowledged by everyone who knows him.  A favorite with the grandparents and relatives – he just simply is a special person inside and out.

At 19 – he is still trying to find his way – and I am touched by his gentle spirit – the way he interacts with kids younger than himself and the way he ministers with his gifts – using them to bless others.

And yet – in many ways he is still a child – not yet ready to face the world.  He is one step closer – but still not ready.  He still has some lessons to learn – some pain to face and get through – some hard times to wrestle with and toughen him up – finding his way and finding out who he is and who God has designed him to be. We have done our best with him – and most of our lessons are through – he has absorbed all he can – and now the rest is up to him.  And like all parents of boys of this wild and adventurous age – we are anxious for him to make the right choices and hope and pray we have equipped him to do what he needs to do.  At this age – the parenting is mostly over for him.  And all we can do is pray – and wait.

Happy Birthday to my son who used to light candles for me – play soft music and run a hot bath for me – just because.

Happy Birthday to my son who was very wanted and planned for. I remember praying for you before you were born and asking God for another child – and I knew that child would be special – and you are.

Happy Birthday to my son – who is far from perfect – but who is perfect for me. You make my heart smile – and your humor brightens even the darkest of my days.  God gave you to me – to raise, watch over and pray for – He knew what He was doing – you are my gift – my love and my life. And He knew that I needed you. I can’t imagine what my life would have been like without you in it.  Each day you make me proud and happy – just by being you – and along with you big sister – you are the best thing that ever happened to me.

I love you

P.S. It’s after midnight now – officially your birthday – I texted happy birthday to you – and just received  a text  back – ‘ I love you too, Mom – you’re the first to wish that to me, Mom – almost home  – wanna chat?’  Ahhh – not too grown up yet.

Yes – I do.

Beautiful Music

Music makes one feel so romantic – at least it always gets on one’s nerves – which is the same thing nowadays.

Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

Music is the language of the heart.  No one knows for sure why we connect to certain styles or songs – but one thing is for certain:  Everyone has a certain style of music that speaks and moves them.  One style can be just ‘noise’ to one person – and a beloved ballad to another.  Music can be annoying to some – and greatly appreciated by another.

I was raised on classical music – it played in my home growing up – night and day.  After a steady diet of this for 20 years of my life – I would have to say that I have an appreciation for classical – but it is not what I listen to when I relax.  I have always liked and responded to ‘pop’ music of my generation – the 70’s and it is still my favorite genre of music – by far even though I have an appreciation for other styles.  I would listen to my transistor radio or cassette tapes in my tape recorder at night before going to bed.  I was also a song writer and my ‘style’ of music on the piano was in a ballad form – or what you might call ‘easy listening’ today.  Music has to evoke an emotional response from me in order to be good – and it usually has something to do with the chord progression or lyrics – or both.  Movie soundtracks are also my favorite for relaxing and one of the best musical scores in my opinion is from the movie “Meet Joe Black”.  I also love the soundtrack from “To Kill a Mockingbird” – these are both noteworthy in my opinion and brilliant.

I like to think I am extremely tolerant of any kind of music – even though I’m sure my own children think I am not.  That’s pretty typical.  But since they know I appreciate any style of music if it’s good – they are quick to share their music with me.  Shawn loves to play ‘his music’ for me in the car – going quickly to a song he feels I will like – and usually he is right.  I don’t like everything he likes – but there are certain songs from bands he likes – that he knows I will be able to appreciate and give positive feedback to.  I think it helps him to feel better about his music in some weird twisted way ☺

About a year and a half ago –  he was driving me to a Chiropractor’s appointment and he played me the song below, “Amsterdam” from Coldplay. Now crazy as it sounds – it really moved me.  I remember it was raining and dark and this song played in the car and we drove in complete hushed silence.  It was one of those moments I will never forget.  A bonding moment with this song playing – just me and my son.  It was pretty emotional – I was going through a rough time that fall – and it meant a lot to me that Shawn actually seemed to ‘get it’ and find something he knew I would connect with.

The other day Shawn drove me to a wedding and he again pulled out this song and it brought back such memories of that day for both of us.  Imagine?  Two people from two entirely different generations – actually agreeing on and liking the same song – and the same band.  Crazy right?  Actually – Shawn likes classic rock from the 70’s too – so that’s always been the way we’ve been able to connect with music over the years.  I think it’s really great.  And because I have tolerance for his music and he with mine – we’ve been able to agree on many things over the years.  It is wonderful to know that he is a much sought after musician in his church on both drums and guitar and that he can appreciate music of all styles too.  I am very proud when I hear songs that he has written and recorded on the guitar – mixed in a studio – and they sound just like something you’d hear on the radio!  In fact when doing my own music ‘mix’ a few months ago – I accidentally added a song he had written – thinking it was a great song from “Angels and Airways” or something.  He saw that I had added it and said, “Mom – did you know that is the song I wrote”?  Ha!  No I didn’t! – but it was really good and that’s why I choose it for my CD mix.

Music – it’s a crazy thing – one man’s ‘noise’ is another one’s ‘bliss’ – and it’s nice to know that good music – is still good music – no matter what generation it is produced.  There are classics that have and will stand the test of time because they are well written – from the heart.

Do you have something that ‘moves you’?  We all do – and it’s nice to know that we are all different in our likes and dislikes – and yet the human element of music is still there – touching and affecting our lives – evoking good and bad memories – but most of all – deeply moving us.

Here’s to beautiful music – and not just annoying ‘noise’ in your world tonight.

God Bless

Come on, oh my star is fading
I swerve out of control
If I, If I'd only waited
I'd not be stuck here in this hole.

Come here, oh my star is fading
And I swerve out of control
And I swear I waited and waited
I've got to get out of this hole

But time, is on your side
It's on your side, now
Not pushing you down
And all around
It's no cause for concern..

Come on, oh my star is fading
And I see, no chance of release
And I know I'm dead on the surface
But I'm screaming underneath

And time is on your side
It's on your side, now
Not pushing you down
And all around
Oh, It's no cause for concern

Stuck on the end of this ball and chain
And I'm on my way back down.

Stood on the edge
Tied to a noose
Sick to the stomach
You can say what you mean
But it won't change a sin
I'm sick of the secrets
Stood on the edge, tied to a noose
and you came along but you cut me loose
You came along and you cut me loose
You came along and you cut me loose

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