Musings From A Musical Mind

Posts tagged ‘People’

Do you want to be Right? Or Be Restored?

The Voice of a broken heart

Image by WolfS♡ul via Flickr

In the last few days – this is the article that has been viewed the most on my blog site. It’s one that I feel is often the culprit keeping friendships and people apart. What a wonderful world this would be if everyone would rather be reconciled – than be right.

Happy October 1st to all of you in ‘blog world’ and enjoy the article!

God Bless

Be kind to one another with a brother’s love, putting others before yourselves in honor    Romans 12:10 Hmmmmmm.  That is indeed the question.  Have you ever known anyone like this in your life?  As long as they’re right – and have the last word they are happy.  Well at least they feel like they’re happy. You see “being right” does not necessarily bring closure and restoration to an unresolved issue.  It can just create a wedge between people.  I … Read More

via Cindy Holman’s Blog

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I’m Not Crazy – I CAN Carry My Own

Grocery Store Madness

The craziest moments seem to happen to us in grocery stores. I’m not sure why – maybe it’s because so many people come for a quick stop at the store – hoping no one will see them (like me) – or maybe it’s because all the tabloids are right by the register where you can’t help but read them while you wait in line. Or maybe it’s because at some grocery stores they have what is getting more and more popular – (and more and more annoying) the ‘self check out‘ line. This approach to ‘simple checkout’ is always hilarious for us – as every store seems to have different machines to operate. And for some reason we never can operate any of them successfully!

I know I just CAN’T be the only one who has felt like an idiot while trying to ‘scan’ my items over this tiny little ‘electric eye’. And I know I CAN’T be the only one in the universe that has to scan her items several times to get the blasted thing to ‘beep’, right? And then to add insult to injury – usually I forget to put the item where it should be – and the lady’s voice keeps repeating, ‘please put the item in the bag’. Why? I’m not done yet! But saying this does NOT help. Sometimes the machine does not know what to do with me – and the ‘real’ person comes flying in – to my rescue and presses buttons really fast (the machine likes her – not me) and then I can continue on. I think the machine is possessed. And not in a good way.

Maybe it’s the fact that one time a few years ago on our way out-of-town for a vacation – we stopped at a grocery store to pick something up. Greg decided to go to another part of the store – and I was getting gum or mints – something very small. I remember paying for it and the check person (male) asked me if I needed ‘help out with that’? I stood there for a moment – looked at my one purchase and decided to have a little fun. “Do I look like I would need help out with this”? I said. Rather embarrassed – the male check person (about 18) said, ‘we’re required to ask that, ma’am.” As if that settled the question – once and for all. Well of course it didn’t – not for me! I said, ‘well – you better tell your people that it’s insulting to ask that question – it makes us feel stupid or something – I mean, come on! Help out with a pack of gum?”

Well I can tell you – that it must be some kind of rule or something – because every time I’m in the store – even with Greg – (that’s the really funny part) they always ask it! Greg always laughs and says, ‘that’s why I brought my wife – she’s the pack-horse‘ (har, har) – but these people never think we’re mentally qualified or physically able to carry a couple of bags to our car. Pretty funny. Anybody else out there feel this way – or is it just me?

No I’m NOT crazy. And just for the record – I CAN carry my own!!

The Love Relationship

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Image via Wikipedia

I was in the gym today with Greg when he said something that sparked a long humorous conversation.  He was trying to tell me something – I didn’t hear correctly – started to interject something totally different – and he stopped me and said, ‘You’re just not hearing me – you’re not hearing my heart‘  Oh brother.  I say ‘Oh brother’ because he is saying it with TONS of sarcasm in his voice – and a chuckle at my expense!!

This has been a part of our love relationship for years now.  The differences in us that make us laugh.  Greg making fun of women – (mainly me) and imitating  all the silly ‘girly’ phrases and things we women do.  It works for him – because he always manages to get some kind of reaction from me – and he likes that.  And I tease and poke fun at him – when he becomes too serious – or too stuffy – and it always makes him laugh.

Men love to make fun of women.  Case and Point:  The movie ‘Titanic” – where the old Rose is saying about her memory of Jack (the man she loved) – ‘he saved me in every way a woman can be saved’.  Greg loves to make fun at that movie – and especially cheesy lines like that.  His first response is – ‘You’ve GOT to be kidding, right’?  But I know what she meant by that line in the movie – women get it. Women understand these deep mysteries of feelings and emotions – and Men pretend they don’t. When probed – I have discovered that men really do get it – it’s just not ‘manly’ to admit it.

Now why is this?  Men have feelings and emotions – this is for certain – and no one can hurt a man like a woman can.  Remember the recent series “Men of a certain age”?   Actor Ray Romano tells his son about women, ‘they have many ways they can hurt us”.

So if this is true – and men feel the same feelings about love and other things that we do – why is it considered weak – or ‘girly’ to admit it?  Very few men will admit to crying at a sad movie – although I’ve seen both my husband and son do it – but not many others.  Most men are guarded when it comes to expressing those ‘touchy feely’ feelings.  And I believe it is drilled into them as little boys to be tough and not show emotion.  That somehow it weakens them to admit they struggle – or have fear – or are afraid – or feel helpless in the midst of love – or can be hurt enough to cry.  Remember the song in the 70’s by the group ’10cc’ where one of the lines is ‘Big boys don’t cry’?  How sad that men believe this – how sad that they are made to feel they must be like this.

It is interesting that when you know a man – really know him – he is not afraid to reveal some of that emotion.  But he must feel safe. And just because they don’t feel like they always can express emotions like a woman can – does not mean that they don’t have them.

I’ve been married to this man of mine for 29 years this Sunday – and one of the great things I’ve discovered is this:  we are different – but we are basically the same underneath all the layers.  Our emotions are basically the same – with different reactions to pain and hurt.  We both know what it feels like to be vulnerable and misunderstood – or to be used and tossed aside.  We both understand love and relationships – and have felt all sorts of emotions in relation to each other and in raising children.  We both can still make each other laugh – and we’re great friends – even through some of the rough patches that life has thrown at us.  And that’s so nice to know. ♥

He will continue to tease and make fun – I will continue to make him scratch his head in confusion – and make him laugh – it is our dance.  And so our journey continues – with its mysteries and lessons – and its laughter. It is our story – it is our love relationship.

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