Musings From A Musical Mind

Posts tagged ‘Truth’

November Wind

something missing

but cleanly restored

swept away

no untidy remnants

drifted away

just a thought

nothing more

an idea when pressed

is only distortion

not complete

fueled by false

selective memory

and personal reality

meaning nothing

missing something

just what

I don’t know

what seemed real

now I know was not

yet missing it

has become

my reality

where is that truth

seen through my limited scope

it has become

a true false

without regard

or notice

blown away

bitter and cold

without remorse

sometimes sunshine

and laughter

but mostly

eternal rain

and confusion

past all reason

and time

like the November wind

A Life Worth Watching

god

god (Photo credit: the|G|™)

“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.” –Unknown

At the end of the day – when no one else is watching, that is where truth and honesty shake hands and become good friends.  Forced together in the privacy of my own heart – this is where I find myself,  facing my own life and my own truth.

It is not what I do in public, or even with good friends – it is what happens to me in private that really matters.

I can “put it on” – and shine for people – light up a stage, cause people to laugh, or even brighten someone’s day.  But it is in that secret place that only I know about, where my life begins and ends.

My good deeds will indeed be remembered by many, and my encouragement and willingness to lend a hand to those in need, my gifts of service to others and even things I write about, be note worthy and even may be talked about at the end of my time here on earth.

But it is in my heart – the place where no one sees that is of worth to God alone.  He takes special interest – enough to make a permanent dwelling place there.  It is there that I cannot hide my attitude, my motives and my desires.  I am forced to be real, honest, flawed, imperfect, disheartened, confused, depressed, even rebellious and questioning.  Most of these things I can easily hide from you.  But I cannot hide it from myself or God.

So for me to be a success – it is not in the outward, the things I have accomplished in my work, with friends or family – it is in the private moments and in the state of my own heart.  The place that I am reduced to each day when I am alone with my own thoughts.  Where God remains with no signs of bolting.  He stays through the toughest storms in my mind – the confusion of hurt, and even when I’m not being honest with myself.  He stays to be a gentle reminder of what my life can be.  A buffer to still the messiness and clutter that I take on myself.  He alone knows the real me – what my life is really like away from the eyes of people I know.

And though I am well aware that I have not arrived – I would like my private life – that only God and I know about to be His vision for me.

One where I have learned through experience, time and patience that kindness, gentleness, meekness and graciousness have won and are becoming more evident, more real, each new year – as I strain forward to be more loving and more understanding and compassionate, regardless of circumstances around me, or reactions of events or from people who have come and gone.  It will be that steady, unwavering conviction that love always wins, gentleness heals, and showing mercy is always the best way.

This is what I hold as a true value in my life – and the true test whether I have been a success at the end of my life.

What about you?  Will your life be a life worth watching?

God Bless

When Is Truth – Just Perspective?


truth
 

Does Truth really work?  According to the picture it does.  I sometimes wonder.  My perspective on the truth may be totally different from yours.

Is it possible to live in a world where people really say what they feel – are honest with themselves and others?

Or

Do you hide, like I do – and try to spare feelings?  Is the risk of being too honest not worth the “fall-out” from the other person?  Even if it’s the truth?

As we forge through life trying to live in the way we feel that God would have us live – is it always “safe” to be really honest?

If you are like me – you’ve been burned by being too honest – or not honest enough.

Is there a place in between where we all can live peaceably? Agree to disagree and be okay with that?

A place of safety and security in bearing our most important thoughts and opinions?  Is being silent the best way to handle a most difficult situation?  Or is skating around an issue really the best way to live – so to not offend?

When was the last time you felt you had to spare someone’s feelings and lost your way in the midst by having to compromise your own?  When was the last time you just “bit it” and told the truth (as you saw it) – and paid a high price for the “fall-out”.

The truth is – we can’t always.

Personal truth is relative.

Is this really truth?  Or is it just personal interpretation of the truth? 

Is truth just my own personal perspective?

My truth may not be acceptable or even the same truth as yours.  Just when I am reconciled to my own truth – as soon as I own it and feel safe with it – I am hit with another ‘truth’ – YOURS!

These are tough issues for us sensitive – ‘peace maker’ types of people.  Because we care deeply what people think – when maybe we shouldn’t.

Sometimes silence is best.

Speaking “truth” in love – does not always set you free – in the way we are led to believe.

I believe that the only one we can really be that honest and transparent with – is God Himself.  He is not shocked or ‘bent out of shape’ by our opinions, thoughts and feelings.  He made us and understands our unique personality.  He does not require anything from us – except our heart.  He does not want us to “hide” our real self from Him – instead He wants us to ‘bare our soul’ to Him in prayer.  He is the one true friend who promises us a safe place to land when we vent, act out, express a need, desire, opinion or even – YIKES – a lack of faith, character flaw, indiscretion or failure.

He is my personal truth – and His opinion is the only one I need be concerned with.  His assessment of me – is all I care about.  He is TRUTH.  All truth comes from Him alone.  He has set a high value on you and me – and that truth, my friend is the only truth that will last – long after our opinions and petty disagreements have passed.  His is not a perspective, it just simply is.

And that’s the honest truth.

God Bless

 

How’s Your Garden?

The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring
whose waters never fail.
Isaiah 58:11

This is our garden in our new home.

Ever felt really dry?  I’m so glad to know this:  No matter how dry, sick, diseased, tired, hopeless and out of strength I may be today – He will water me and give me the strength, nourishment and life so that I will flourish.  When all others around me are dry and broken – I will be sustained by that living water to keep me going, bringing health to my bones – and hope for all others around me looking for that water.  It is a spring that never fails.

How’s your garden?  Need some water?

Praying for you today.

God Bless

My Truth

A father and his daughter, 1923

Image via Wikipedia

I’ve been watching the reality show about Ryan and Tatum O’Neil on the OWN station – the tumultuous father and daughter relationship resulting in a separation and silence for the past 25 years.  They both agreed it was time to put the past behind them and try to begin again to rebuild their lost relationship – through this series on cable.

It has been very interesting and heartbreaking at the same time.  To get a glimpse into someone’s pain is never easy – to feel hope for them as they talk and uncover much of their difficulties – and why things went so bad for them.  Through counseling, alone and together, they are getting to the deep issues which caused their separation in the first place.

But what I’ve noticed is this:  We all have our own truth.  It is ours.  

Truth cannot be negotiated or argued.  It is different for everyone.  It is something that we believe about ourselves, others and our situation.

In having my truth – I am not saying that you do not have yours as well – but my truth – is my truth.  It is my version of the story – it is what I believe in my heart of hearts.

We do damage to ourselves and others when we try to rewrite their truth for them.

When two people have different “truths” – and will not validate the other for having their own unique truth – there can be no settling of accounts – no matter how much counseling they have.  And at the end of the day – their personal truth will be all they have.

I really believe with all my heart – that all people just want to be recognized and validated for having their own truth.  No matter how weird it may sound.  Even if you think you know better and think they are ALL MESSED UP.  We want someone to say to us, “I understand.  I get how you could feel that way.  I see you”  So often we never get that response that we are seeking.

All Ryan needs from his daughter, Tatum is this:  “I see you Dad – I’m just as much to blame as you are”  And Tatum needs to hear Ryan say, “I take ownership in my part of our separation.  I made many mistakes and I’m sorry you felt abandoned”  Isn’t it too bad – they will probably never be able to really say those things to each other – too much history – too much blame – too much sadness.

I am glad to know this:   The only solid place for me to go when regarding the “truth” is Jesus. The Bible tells me that He IS the Truth and the Life.  And with so many personal “truths” out there – varying with every person on the planet – He is the only constant who never changes.  I can run to Him – feel that acknowledgment and validation from the source – the creator – who holds My past with all of its regret – the present with all of its unanswered questions – and the future with all of its secrets, not yet revealed to us.  When others shun, devalue and withhold from us – He is there holding out loving arms of truth to me.

Do you allow others to have their personal truth?  Do you feel validated from others?  Have you acknowledged Jesus to be the only real truth in your life?

God Bless

New Dream

dreams and wishes. 62/365

Image by nicole.pierce.photography ♥ via Flickr

I looked for someone

like searching in a fog

chasing after

an endless mist

straining for

that unattainable someone

or something

thinking that it would satisfy

what’s deep within

heart-sick and weary

all my efforts

came up empty

and my searching

and reaching

brought no relief

for I found

that in the searching

it was me that I found instead

alone and empty

sad and confused

“Is what I seek

my dream only?

never satisfied

why do

I continue to pursue?

Are my “dreams” just those I make up

bringing emptiness

and endless struggle

instead of fulfillment

and relief?”

And yet I searched for you

my unobtainable someone

and something

that threatened to destroy

and devour me

The one I craved

the things I craved

could be my undoing

and the searching

and dreaming for them

like a slow death

And at the end of the road

I was still there

running on empty

defeated and broken…

It was when I was at my weakest

and tired of running after

and insisting on my own way

that He came

and I heard

a still small voice

and in my confusion

and tears

which caused me to slow down

be still

and listen

that I heard Him

that voice changed me

as He reached in

and held the broken

and confused me

and finally I don’t need to know

all the reasons for before

I reluctantly surrender

and replace

all the running

and searching

for something unknown

instead of something

that does not satisfy

and begin a new path

with His dreams

and plans for me

and at the end of the road

there is no disappointment

and emptiness

or brokenness

and I have almost 

vanished from view

even though

my selfishness and pride

are still there

but they are covered

and kept in check

and it is He that is waiting

giving me

a new dream

which fulfills

and satisfies

instead of

all the things

I wanted

and thought I needed

He is giving me

much more

than I could ever dream

as He replaces my will

with new people

new things

and a new dream

 

What is your dream today?  Have you surrendered yours for His?

 

God Bless

 

 

What Is Your Personal Truth? – Part Two

true! when u have faith! i saw this, and i wan...

Image via Wikipedia

Yesterday I touched on a subject that is delicate.  One that is personal and can sometimes be secretive.  Ownership and a grasp of a deep and contemplative question:  What is your personal truth?  I explained it – and expanded on it just a little in an attempt to show how if we are not able to grasp that for ourselves – it is impossible to be totally authentic with God.

First – what does truth mean?  It can mean two things:

1.  Truth can be scary.  What if I admit something about my character to God that is less than what others believe of me – or less than I even have attempted to believe about myself?  What if God does not accept me when He finds out?  What if He rejects me?

2. Truth brings personal responsibility.  As long as no one knows – and I have cleverly hidden all aspects of myself from God – then I cannot be held responsible.  Once revealed for what it really is – I must take ownership and change the behavior.  There is no middle ground on this.  And this can be scary.

And although most of us believe that God is a loving God who forgives – whether raised in church or not – it is still easy to believe this in our head only – and not really believe it with our heart.  I mean – there’s a limit to what God will forgive, right?  Or what He will accept about me, right?  And so with this thinking it can be difficult to really come clean with things like:

Dishonesty

Failure (moral or otherwise)

Addiction

Greed and selfishness

Idolatry

It is easy to hide from things in the above list –  and not really admit or own it.

What if my personal truth looks like this?:

 I am a failure

 I am a liar

I am an addict

I am worthless

I caused someone I love to go away

I am not lovable

If God knew what I thought He would not love me

All of the above statements could be true in your life today.  But here is the really good news:

God has a different view of truth.  He is able to cut to the chase whether I am honest about myself to Him or not.  He will wait for a confession – and an admission of truth from me – He is a gentleman.  And when I allow Him to change how I see that truth based on His reflection of love and grace – I find there is no fear – only a far greater understanding of myself than I ever thought I had.  And it’s okay – because He loves me anyway – just the way I am – broken, full of sin and failure, unable to help myself or even be honest about it.

His personal truth for ME radically changes my life.

His truth looks like this:

I don’t see personal failure – I see a bruised masterpiece

I don’t see addiction – I see a wonderful freedom

I don’t see inadequacy and the feeling of worthlessness – I see a precious gift

I don’t see the sin – it’s been covered

God’s truth is better than my attempt at truth

God’s truth is better than my self-righteous claim

God’s truth does not have any room for my pride or feeling of entitlement

What I try to deny and hide from Him – He knows and will deal with me

God’s truth about me – is the only truth I need in my life.

God’s truth is the only thing that will change my behavior from the inside out.

His truth says:

I am worth so much – that He sent His son – to die for me. 

Wow.  Is it really possible that I’m worth dying for?  How can that be?

He values me

He loves me

I am worthy

I am validated

I am loved

And no matter what I do – I cannot change this truth about myself – as God sees me.  It is indisputable in His eyes.

Are there areas of your heart that you have not allowed God to shine His truth?  How long has it been since you were able to “come clean” with Him?

I am praying today that you would not believe a “truth” about yourself that is destructive and steeped in failure or inadequacy to measure up.  I am praying that you will confess these “truths” to God and allow Him to begin a new “truth” in your life today – a “truth” that He sees you as – valuable and lovable – no matter what.

God Bless


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