Getting In Shape LA Fitness Style

On Monday – Greg and I joined a gym.  It’s the first time for Greg – the second for me.  I belonged to “Curves” for 2 years – and then got bored as many do – when you do the same thing for that long.  Last year was a very stressful “new season” of our lives – which included my husband quitting his job after 13 years at the same church – and our daughter getting married.  We were just trying to make his “new business” get off the ground – and get our daughter married off – there was little time to really have a good and regular “workout” routine.  I am also a “fair weather” walker – and living in Seattle – well….you get the idea.  My husband had been very regular about his workouts on his treadmill – until it broke several months ago.  I hadn’t gone near the stupid thing since over a year ago falling off of it – yeah – it wasn’t pretty.  The thing ended up traumatizing me and I haven’t wanted anything to do with it since.

So….we really needed to get WITH IT!!!  And get back into the program.  There is a pretty new LA Fitness in our area – complete with all the “state of the art” equipment – a swimming pool – sauna – and my personal favorite – the HOT TUB!!!   Oh yes.  I plan to spend some time in that FOR SURE!!!  I am even going to take a Zumba class that my friend, Jackie leads.  My daughter and I will dance our way to fitness – if it KILLS US.  And for me – it probably will.

Today Greg and I went in and had a consult with a personal trainer (a most impressive young man who used to play for the Seahawks – until he was injured) who showed us how to use the equipment and what workouts would be the best for us – working weights on 3 different days a week and allowing muscle groups to rest in between – cardio everyday after weights.  He was very nice and VERY patient – I can assure you – it is difficult to show me anything – as I have a million questions and think everything and everyone is HILARIOUS!  But being as we cannot afford a personal trainer – wow are they EXPENSIVE!!! – we wanted to find out all we could FOR FREE and so he was kind enough to write down many things for us to try – and we will be taking all his suggestions to heart.

Greg and I plan to do this together.  There is NO WAY I’m going to the club by myself with all the interesting guys in there – and I’m not really all that comfortable with the whole “weight training” thing – it will be helpful to have my big handsome husband to look out for me – and the sleazy guys ☺If there are any.  I plan to use the elliptical – instead of the treadmill (for the above stated reason) for cardio – my daughter LOVES the bike – but I’m not sure it I will. There is a cycling class that apparently will kick your behind!  Not sure I’m ready for that ☺

It all seems a bit overwhelming – but I’m looking forward to trying it – and seeing the results too♥  The water aerobics seem fun too.  There was only one guy and about 40 women in the class this morning.  Greg says he thinks the guy will be back ☺

Have a great day!

God Bless

My Love List

There is an excellent book called “The Love List” by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott that has a list of wonderful things for marriages.  In it they have things that couple should do once a day – once a week – once a month and once a year.  I thought I would take this list and add a few of my own personal favortes to it.  Enjoy!

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.

E.E. Cummings

Once a day:

1. Find something that makes both of you laugh.  Humor has become the foundation of our  marriage – even in the rough patches.  Humor can relieve the tension – and even take the focus off of the negative and prevent us from being too self absorbed and selfish.  Those that are the healthiest laugh often and can even laugh at themselves.

2. Take time to touch.  Even if it is just a caress on the arm or hand – and kiss on the cheek  – it is still some physical contact that says much.  I am a “huggy” person – so physical touch is never hard for me.  If you don’t tend to be too physical – it may be just what your partner wants and needs – just a little squeeze for reassurance can mean so much.  Learn to be a FLIRT!!  It does wonders, that’s all I can say!

3.  Say something nice.  We can live off a good compliment for days – sometimes even weeks!  A kind word of encouragement is so endearing – especially from one you love.  This will boost their self esteem level and help them to be more positive and productive.  Our words are so powerful.

The development of a really good marriage is not a natural process.  It is an achievement.

David and Vera Mace

Once a week:

1. Have a date night.  More often than once a week if you can manage it.  It isn’t always possible at different seasons of your life – especially with young children, as that can get expensive – but budget for it – it is time and money well spent!  We are in a season of our lives where we have been dating much more often than once a week and it has changed and rejuvinated our marriage.

2. Plan to do active things together.  Maybe you both could take up golf or join a gym together.  Greg and I love to play golf – we played it before we had any children and we began to get back to playing it a couple of years ago – we need to do it more often!  It’s fun to play together!  Maybe just getting out for an after dinner stroll – or driving to a scenic place and doing some hiking and have lunch together.  All good stuff.

Spending recreational time with his wife is second only to sex for the typical husband.

Willard F. Harley Jr.

Once a month:

1. Plan your schedules together.  Find out what is happening during what days – what times are going to work for “dates” and when you’re going to be especially busy.  We do this now – sometimes even doing this on a weekly basis so we know how to plan – the schedule gets trickier when you are both self employed!

2. Take inventory of the previous month.  What worked?  What didn’t?  Talk about it – and make a conscious effort to spend more time to put the priority of you marriage at the top of the list.  Greg and I have literally spent hundreds of hours talking over the last year to make our marriage better.

3. Stay connected during the week physically and emotionally.  Be in tune to the other ones needs.  Greg has learned that I need emotional connection.  I need it all the time.  It has not been easy for him to stay alert and in tune – but he decided that it was worth it – and he says it’s been like going back to school and getting his degree in understanding me.  What a high compliment to me!  That he thought I was worth it.  That he would relearn some things that he had not been doing all through our marriage – that led to some misunderstanding and problems.  It was hard work – but he was determined!  Physical connection has been a bonus because of the hard emotional work.  We’ve become like a couple of teenagers – and I wouldn’t trade that away for anything in the world!  So worth it.  Talk A LOT!!!   Get really honest and authentic.  Do it.  It’s worth it – not always easy – but worth it.

Thrills come at the beginning and do not last…Let the thrill go and you will find you are living in a world of new thrills.

C.S. Lewis

Once a year:

Have a real vacation get away.  We try to do “mini” trips throughout the year – but once a year you should really go somewhere new and have a real “change”.  Plan for it in advance – put it on the calendar and then DO IT.  We like to go on cruises – we plan about a year and a half out – book it – put a deposit on it and then save for it throughout the year and a half.  We have been all over the place because we have not only talked about it – but we’ve been ON PURPOSE about going.  If you never plan for it – you will never do it.  This is our special “alone” time – just the two of us and it is not easy for us to share those times with others.

2. Don’t be afraid of change.  Change is the constant in this world and we must embrace it.  If we settle just for the “same old, same old” – that is what kind of marriage you will have.  You must stay current and be willing to listen more and talk less – truly make the necessary adjustments for our partner.  If we truly love and want to be loved back – you must resist the tempatation to take them for granted and think, “they already know how I feel”.  As time goes by it is even more important to do things for your partner to let them know that they are first priority.  If you do not do this – it can be like “death” to a marriage.  Ask your partner what you can do to be “better”.  And then really listen.  Make the decision that they are worth it to you.  Woman need emotional connection and a smart man will fill that need for her.  Men need physical love and admiration.  A smart woman will fill that need.  No one wants to be accused of not doing the best thing for the one they love.  Marriage problems begin because people stop doing these things.  They don’t pay attention anymore.  Don’t be that person.

Chains do not hold a marriage together.  It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years.

Simone Signoret

Here’s wishing you and yours a Happy Valentine’s week as you embrace a “Love List” of your very own.

God Bless

Loud Noises

So today we had a beautiful SUNNY day in Seattle.  Yes – it happens ALL THE TIME here – that’s why everyone is buzzing about it today ♥  Not really – we get excited in Seattle – especially in the winter months – okay – even in the spring (as one of my friends pointed out today) because we can go for quite a while without seeing it.

Most people LOVE to see the sun.  Makes them feel happier – drives away the doldrums etc.  However, for me – much as I love the sun too – it can bring a change in the barometric pressure so severe that I get an intense headache.  Unfortunately these can happen while I sleep – so by the time I wake up – it’s too late for any serious medication to help.  Oh I don’t mean a migraine – that is a completely different kind of pain – and once in a migraine folks – just forget it.  Nothing helps unless you can catch it right up front.

This headache was sinus – and really stubborn.  Greg thought some fresh air would help – so off to Coulon Park in the town that we live – to do some walking after eating some lunch.  While in the lunch place – I was KEENLY aware of the loud noises coming from some little kids – who seemed to be VERY FOND of randomly just SCREAMING out – for some unknown, crazy reason.  One was a BLOOD CURDLING scream – unprovoked and unpredicted – as my back was turned from the child – and Greg was facing in that direction but did not even warn me about this sudden OUTBURST of LOUD NOISE.  You can imagine my response.  And my headache suddenly became worse.  Really?  You’re kidding – why do babies and children do that?  Mine never did.  I’m sure they made noise – just not random SCREAMING in a public place.  I was embarrassed for the Mom.

Light also bothers me when I have a headache – and we tried the walk – but because it’s so sunny – and the headache was now WORSE – we gave up and I went home only to take more pills and put ice on my head – again.

So I’m trying to rest – and even dozed off a little – finally fell asleep – which is a small miracle and the next thing I know – I can hear my dear “quiet” husband – speaking on the phone VERY LOUDLY in the next room without even so much as closing the door to his office or anything.  It was annoying – and even worse because of my bad headache.  He woke me UP!!  So being the nice, patient person that I am – I got up – and STOMP, STOMP, STOMP when into his office and said, “are you KIDDING ME?  Don’t you realize how LOUD you are???””  and then SLAMMED the door.  Well it completely threw him off – and he didn’t know what to say next on the phone – he’s not used to being yelled at – I’m usually so patient and so nice ☺  So later when I got up and told him about it – I was amazed at how mad he was!  It reminded us of that line from “A Christmas Carol” when Scrooge throws out a man from his office for not paying the rent – and the man says, “Thanks for not shouting at me” – we had a good chuckle over it – as you can imagine.

The headache got better – as the day went on – a little caffeine didn’t hurt either – and I was able to still teach my students – and be in a relatively good mood too!

Here’s to you and yours – hoping your world is filled with peaceful, quiet and soothing sounds today!

God Bless

Getting Cute

It finally happened.  I looked in the mirror and saw…my……….Okay someone REALLY OLD.  Since my own mother and grandmother NEVER looked their age – I can’t even use that as an example.    I have these HUGE bags under my eyes this morning – and was reminded of the line from one of the episodes of Star Trek Next Generation – “I see time has NOT been kind, Jameson.”  It’s a joke around our house whenever someone looks pretty worn out and haggard.  Well this morning it’s ME!!!!  I didn’t even recognize the reflection – and I got more sleep last night than I have in the last 3!!  It doesn’t make any sense at all – but the good news is this:  My HAIR LOOKS GREAT!!! ♥

Men are sooooooooo lucky.  They always look great.  My dear husband was pretty wiped out yesterday – we had a theater practice where he is the narrator for the production – and STILL – he looks great!  How do they do it?  Not a smidge of makeup on – and they still mange to look “fresh” and “put together”  It’s not fair.  Men just walk out of the shower looking great!  That NEVER happens to women.  Oh yes – we have our good days – no bags under our eyes – and that perfect hair day – but it’s NEVER like a man.

You think we’re cute?  It takes longer and longer each year to GET CUTE!!  And that’s the truth.

Greg will say to me on some mornings – can we go in about 20 minutes?  Knowing I haven’t even been in the shower yet.  And I smile and say, “sure”.  That 20 minutes later I’m still just blow drying my hair – haven’t put a smidge of anything on my face yet.  It takes WORK to be cute.  Mineral makeup foundation – a little blush – eyebrow pencil – eye shadow, liner and mascara.  And that’s only to look normal. I have never been one to wear much makeup – I don’t over do it at all – in fact – some guys don’t even think that I wear any – sometimes.  That’s the POINT!!  You shouldn’t look like you wear any.  It’s supposed to just make you look normal. And I don’t wish to frighten anyone – especially men and children.  I work with Junior High kids – do you think I want them to point and stare at the “scary lady”?  No.  So I usually need about 15 more minutes.  It’s okay – he’s used to it ♥

I think today I will have to work a little longer – to get “cute” and get going on this busy day!  After all – Greg looks SO good all the time – I really must keep up with him!

He just got home – and Wow – he looks GREAT!  But you know what?  He thinks I do too – just as I am – not a smidge of makeup – just me.  And that feels pretty great ♥

Have an awesome day!

God Bless

Can Men Really Get It Right?

My friend Barry found the item below and posted it today on facebook.  I read it and thought, “how true this is”!!We often “settle” – especially as women.  It is not easy to find a “good man” who is loving and kind – gentle and respectful of women.  When you find a good one – HANG ON TO HIM!!!

How many women settle for something WAY different than this model?  Too many.  The amount of verbal and physical abuse among couples is HUGE.  And so many problems happen because of disrespect and apathy.  If more men would take the following and apply it to their lives – the world would be a better place.

Women respond to gentleness.  Women respond to Love.  Women respond to someone who protects them and cares about her emotional needs.  A real man covers – never exposes.  A real man loves someone for WHO they are – not for what they DO – or what they look like on the outside.  A man that is humble,  kind and patient – strong of character and integrity.  Who won’t “talk down” and make someone feel bad. – A real man encourages that woman to be everything she can be – and think she’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

How true this is – for those of us that have found a man like this.  They are rare indeed.  I’ve had friends come and go in my life – and the ones that end up sticking around and being forever friends are the ones that know how to treat me – love and encourage with their words and actions – cover and never expose for their own personal gain.  I love my friends ♥  I have come to trust them over time – men and women who share common things – and who are on a journey with me – in this thing called “life”.  They are the very model of Christ himself to me.  And I have a husband who is ALL of these things listed below.  The longer I know him – the more incredible qualities I see in him.

Here is the list – Enjoy and God Bless!

HOW CAN A WOMAN NOT LOVE THE LORD?

© He is a gentleman,

© He is confident

© He is a provider and protector

© He is rich and powerful

© He owns everything; there is nothing He wouldn’t do for me

© He perfects all things concerning me

© He anticipates my wants and needs

© Every day He tells me and shows me how much He loves me

© I don’t have to perform in order to earn His love

© He keeps all of his promises

© No one can influence His opinion of me

© He is the ultimate intimate partner

© He can’t ‘disown’ me because I am a part of Him

© He prepares a table before me (Selah)

© He covers me and doesn’t expose me

© He wrote His loving words down so that I’ll never forget how He feels about me!

NOW THAT’S LOVE!!!

Any man, w ho wants pointers on how to love a woman, should study GOD!

Wake up every day and thank God for being the best ‘man’ in your life!

Each and everyone one of us is going through tough times right now, but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that only He can.

Keep the faith!
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose..
Romans 8:28 KJV

The Something Box

I have decided that if Men can have a ‘nothing box’ then women should be allowed a ‘something box’.  It seems fair and right.  Oh I know a couple of my good guys friends are going to take issue with this – including my husband – because it is a well know fact that men are the only ones allowed a ‘box’.

But I want my readers to know that I am not in the least bit competitive by nature.  I even let people pass and cut in front of me on the freeway.  To me it is NOT a race and some crazy status symbol to be ‘King of the Road’.  I simply don’t care who gets ahead of me on the road – or even gets there before I do.  I have far too many other things pressing – and that seems very trivial to me.  So you can trust me when I say that my ‘something box’ was not just created to prove something to all the men in my life.  It is as real as your sorry little ‘nothing box’.  Only better.  Much better.

Now the ‘nothing box’ is undisputed as well – and anyone who is married to a man – or has a son – or both – knows what I am referring to.  It’s that blank look on their face when you are talking to them.  It can be in the middle of a sentence and all of a sudden – they just ‘check out’.  Unbelievable.  I don’t think I would have believed it if I had not witnessed it hundreds of times over the years.  There is no one like a man that can do this with such skill and precision.  It’s a thing of beauty, really.

We have an eighteen year old son that still lives at home.  At least he sleeps here sometimes – Okay he drives MY car and EATS here.  That about sums it up.  He will come home from work, school or basketball practice and can be looking right at me – eye ball to eye ball – and I will feel like he’s totally engaged in my conversation – I mean he looks like he is – UNTIL – that blank look that only guys have – comes across his countenance and I KNOW he’s gone to the ‘box’.  I will say, “Shawn, did you hear ANYTHING I said”?  And it will take him a long time to put the words together and figure out that I was actually asking  him a question.  And then it will be “Uhhh – were you talking to me”?  I mean come on.  He was looking RIGHT at me!!!  The ‘nothing box’.

My husband does this too – but he has more skill.  He’s been married to me for 28 years now and knows how to play the game a little better – at least he fakes it.  We will be talking – again – eye ball to eye ball – and he will seem engaged in what I’m saying – and believe me, we have talked HOURS and HOURS in the last year – and then it happens.  I see the signs.  He can’t fool me.  It used to be something I called the ‘lizard blink’ which said, “I’m so tired – when is she going to shut up??”  But ever since our children (much smaller than they are now) caught on to the ‘lizard blink’ they teased their father unmercifully – and he learned NOT to do it anymore.  It meant that he was NOT listening anymore to them either!!

No – he has tried to be clever and conceal his going prematurely to his ‘nothing box’ – and now does something with his mouth.  I can’t explain it – I’ve tried to mimic it – and I’ve even tried to show him what he does – and he FLATLY refuses that he’s doing it!!  What ever am I to do with these guys?  I’m surrounded by testosterone and it’s not pretty sometimes.  No one has perfected the “look” quite like my dear husband.  He does LOVE his ‘box’.

So I have a ‘something box’.  I cannot have a ‘nothing box’ because as soon as I would go to it – I would decorate it – and then it would cease to be ‘nothing’.  No – it’s better that I have a ‘something box’.  I can decorate it any way I like – bring anybody in to visit – knock ideas and thoughts around – play music – write blogs – compose music – plan my day – etc. etc.

The other night I couldn’t sleep.  I was moving around a lot – had a lot on my mind and my mind simply would NOT stop!!!  I scooted over to my sleepy husband who NEVER has trouble sleeping and told him I couldn’t sleep.  He patted me on the head and told me to go to my ‘nothing box’ which he happily lives in.  I explained to him that I don’t HAVE a ‘nothing box’ – everything means something and is connected to something else – well it’s just impossible, that’s all.  So I started thinking about my ‘something box’ instead – and it worked.  I went there and was very contented doing all the things that I needed to do.

You could say that instead of whispering sweet ‘nothings’ in my husband’s ears – I whisper, ‘something’ –  it seems to work.  ☺☺☺

Have a great day!

God Bless

The “Dumb Bird”

We have a permanent visitor in our home.  It is not “Mrs. Grumpy” – although she visits quite a bit.  It is someone who only seems to bother the men that live here.  He will continue to visit as long as there are “male units” that live here.  He is invisible.  He is very real.  He sits on my son’s shoulder and whispers in his ear.  He occasionally sits on my husband’s shoulder too.  But that is another story.  He is called the “Dumb Bird”.

The “Dumb Bird” makes his way into the Holman aviary and flies up the stairs and to the right – our son’s room.  His room is the very worst of “pig sty’s” – and yes  – I am an expert on them – much like Bill Cosby’s Mother was.  The rest of our home he leaves alone – goes straight for Shawn’s room – where he knows he will be welcome.  He’s makes a comfy little nest out of the debris that he finds there.  When he comes – he plans to stay – for a long time.

If you have men in your home – you will have to admit that there is a “Dumb Bird” that has made its way into your home as well – invading your very space – and leaving quite a mess along the way.  Dumbness can do this.  With very little effort.

I teach many pre-adolescent boys – young “male units” and many teenage boys as well – and have for years.   Dumbness is “par for the course”  – Believe me – they are LOADED with it.  And I mean that with much amusement and great affection – and absolutely NO malice – because I say it from having  experience in these predictable and humorous matters – I am the wife of a man – and the mother of a son.  Oh and we can now add – I’m a mother-in-law of another man. All of these facts qualify me to be somewhat of an expert in the subject of the “Dumb Bird”.

Most young girls – Okay – ALL girls – have to just roll their eyes occasionally at “the boys” all around them and say, “it’s a guy thing” .  Interpretation – The “Dumb Bird” has landed – again.  It is fun to watch the interaction between Junior High students as they try to “slug” it out and the boys try to impress the girls.  It’s not much different  with “little boys” that have grown up and just grown tall – as they still seem to keep their boyish cuteness all through life and still love to “impress” the girls at any age – it makes for very fun fodder in social situations. ☺

I wish I had complete sentences to give you FULL examples of what happens when the “Dumb Bird” sits on the shoulder and whispers to  men – but words seem to fail me – and I just have to laugh – throw my hands up in the air and give up entirely.  But it is greatly amusing – and I wouldn’t give it up for anything.

Just know – that bird is always around – making little visits to our home – leaving BIG messes all over the place (Dumb Dung)  and expecting all the female units around to just “understand” and clean it up.  It seems to be our lot in life.  And it gives us much to laugh about when we are together.  And since it is the differences in male and female that seem to “make the world go ’round” then let’s just say – I think that bird is here to stay. ☺

Here’s hoping you can catch that “Dumb Bird” in your home and teach him a lesson – before something dumb happens – again. He is NOT what your family will be having for Thanksgiving this year.  At least – I hope not ☺

Have a fantastic day!

God Bless

Practicing “Safe Dating”

My husband – always the funny guy – coined the phrase above.

I was with my friend the other day for lunch – recently widowed and still pretty young – the subject almost always turns to the “dating” again thing.  She of course is less than anxious to “go there” again – and I mean – who could blame her.  No one wants to date again – if they don’t have to.  In fact – some of us that have been married since we were children don’t even remember much about dating – let alone trying to do that again.  It’s a spine chilling – horrendous thought indeed – enough to give you nightmares and make you want to back out of the human race entirely.

And yet…having many single friends – guys and gals – I will have to say that sometimes love the “second time around” is most successful – particularly if they “happen” to meet the right person through a blind date set up by a good friend who knows both people involved – or by a “safe” online dating service.  And by “safe”  – I’m referring to those services that screen very carefully – get lots of information – have limited contact until certain requirements are met etc.  My friends Teri and Craig met on eHarmony.com and didn’t even talk on the phone for a few months – it was pretty strict.  That site insists that you talk for awhile via email – getting to know each other first – what you believe – your background etc.  and there are many questions that you both must answer first before you are ever “matched” with someone.  When these two finally exchanged pictures and had that first “date” in the mall – they knew quite a bit about each other already – so it was not too awkward.  But anytime you meet someone in person for the first time – it’s going to be a bit awkward – you just can’t help that.  But for them – it worked out and they are happily in their 2nd relationship – after having a bummer of a first.

Sometimes this is not the case – and I’m aware of this.  Statistics show that the divorce rate is even higher for 2nd marriages than for first ones – so it is not always a good thing to end one marriage for another.  I understand there are extenuating circumstances for ending a first marriage – abuse – infidelity etc. –  but usually people say in 2nd marriages – “if I had just worked harder on my first marriage – maybe it would not have ended”.

But like I said – I have many friends in my circle who have found themselves single again – for whatever reason.  And dating is a very scary thing to them.  I can imagine how they feel.  I would not want to do that “dating” thing again either.  Did I EVER date?  I always had a boyfriend during my teen years – but I’m not sure that classifies as a “date”.

What is a date?  I’ve seen my daughter go on one – when she was first dating her husband.  He would come to our house in his car – pick her up at the door after saying hello to us – then he would open the car door for her – and then they would go to a movie and to dinner – maybe the mall to walk around or to Seattle.  He took her to Ocean Shores once for the day – he was always thinking of romantic things that they could do together.  That is a date.  Doesn’t sound so scary, right?  But somehow it is.  If you don’t know that person – what their expectations are – it can be really scary.  Women worry about how they look – someone watching them eat – conversation during a meal – wondering about the physical expectations etc.  I’m not sure what men worry about – because I’m not a man – but I’m sure it’s similar.  Especially if a man is not used to dating that much.  I’m sure it’s – “will she like me – think I’m attractive – want something more than just friendship?”  I’m sure both sexes think much about the “more than friendship” thing.  How can you help it – especially if you are of a certain age – and you’re not kids anymore.

I have decided that nothing is going to happen to Greg – and that I will go first and HE can do the dating thing again – not me.  Even though he is older than me and the odds are in MY favor for outliving him by – oh let’s see – about 10 years.  What’s in a number, right?  He kids me and says that he will outlive me!  Yeah right.

Greg says we all just need to practice “SAFE DATING” – dating with no funny queazy feeling in your stomach – where everything is peaceful – no hidden agenda – no expectations that are unreasonable.  Safe dating where you both feel comfortable – you put each other at ease – conversation just flows and there is tons of laughter.  Where the other person is made to feel like the only person in the world – and the other person is the priority to your day – not the job – not the kids – not other people.  If every married couple would “safe date” there would be fewer divorces and relationship problems.

Lately I’m feeling so cherished and appreciated – Greg’s making up for much lost time in our own relationship and he’s taking it very seriously.  There’s NO WAY he’s going to let some other man appreciate me and meet my emotional needs – when he wants to be the ONLY one who does that – thank you very much.  If every man would take this attitude about the woman in their lives – it would be a much happier, healthier world.

Would I want to date someone else?  Wow.  No.  But if I found myself in that situation some day – my expectations would be pretty high – not sure if anyone could measure up – but like you – I would probably not want to do life all alone.  So I would practice “safe dating” – and would hope the other person would too!

Have an awesome day – practice some “safe dating” with your spouse or with a friend today.

God Bless

He’s Strange and I’m Wonderful

My Darling Husband and I have what you might call a “Strange and Wonderful” relationship after 28 years of marriage.  He’s Strange and I’m Wonderful.  (Sigh) It’s true.

He will – for example want to cuddle and watch a “girly” movie with me sometimes – and he’s actually a pretty good sport at this – just being good and not saying anything condescending during the love scenes or sappy parts – while I am sitting there crying.  He really has to hold it in – but he CAN do it.  It’s just afterward – a few hours or even a few days later that he can’t hold it in any longer and he begins to “make fun” of certain lines from the movie.  I find this annoying and rude – and have told him so – but it does not stop him – he even giggles at some of the serious parts of the movie – APPALLING.

That is not the only annoying thing.  When guys say they “just want to cuddle” you KNOW they don’t really mean that.  But if a woman says that she just wants to cuddle – she MEANS IT.  And guys think WE are confusing.  I say – just call it out as it is instead of hoping for the best – I mean isn’t that what guys are always saying about women?  “If they’d just be clear with what they want – then we wouldn’t have to guess”  Yeah Right.  What about you guys?

I read something humorous when exploring this whole topic of “cuddling” from this guy:

Example situation: On the couch watching a movie. I’m sitting, she lays down, her feet end up in my lap. Without thinking, I’m rubbing her feet/ankles/calves. Pretty soon she starts to wiggle around and I come out of my movie coma to ask if she is okay. Yes she replies, you were tickling my feet!! oops. So she turns around and puts her head in my lap. Back in the tv coma now that she has settled down, I’m subconsciously running my hand up and down her arm, finally finding her hair which I’m stroking. Running my fingers through her hair, teasing it out, twirling it around with . . . . . . . .crap, I think I just tied her hair around my finger. Umm, sweetie. . . . . . . .

Oh yeah, cuddling good!

Well at least he’s trying to “cuddle” and even HE is not getting it right!  Sometimes that physical closeness is all that’s necessary – and cuddling can provide that – in front of a romantic fire – or lying in bed listening to the rain pound down on the roof above you – Awwwww so nice!

I doubt if I will ever get Greg to totally agree with me on that subject though. Because he is a guy.  And a guy always wants and wishes for….uh…. more 🙂

He is Strange – and I am Wonderful – just ask him 😉

 

Have a wonderful day – with lots of cuddling 🙂

 

God Bless

I Sleep With Darth Vader

I didn’t call  Greg –  Darth Vader – he came up with it himself.

Did I mention that Greg snores on his back?  I’m sure I did somewhere back in one of my blog posts.  On his side he is like a quiet little lamb.  But last night because he’s getting a cold – not even his side was working out well.  And when I say that – I mean not working out well FOR ME.  The noise is in his throat and sounds similar to a rattle and a pesky growling sound.  So as I immitated the sound for Greg this morning he said – “Oh you mean – Darth Vader”!  He actually sounded pleased by this new revelation.  I, however am NOT pleased – but annoyed and sleep deprived – again.

Last night was an interesting night all around – and I was having some indigestion problems and was uncomfortable most of the night.  I do not usually have much trouble sleeping – but I sure did last night.  We have the kind of bed that you can raise up and down – and it’s great for the times when my sinuses are bothering me and I need to “prop” up some so I can breathe – also great for things like heartburn and indigestion 🙂  So I’m “propped up” a bit and trying to settle down and SLEEP – when I look over at Greg and see that he’s “hunkered down” FLAT on his BACK – with his big feet hanging off the bottom of the bed.  Well to me – that was insane – as we do have a KING SIZE BED – and Greg is 6’0″ and should fit nicely – feet and all – if he is in the proper sleeping position.  But NO.  He is half way down on the bed – he seems to like it that way – makes him feel all secure and cozy or some such nonsense.  So I had to further investigate the issue at hand – so I got out of the covers and crawled on all fours to see how far his feet were sticking out.  I was just curious – that’s all.  Well I was hanging over him and thought he would just stay asleep – but he woke up and heard me breathing and hovering over him.  AND I need to say that he was MOST GRUMPY when he was awakened in this way!  I find it shocking!  First he’s like, “What ARE you doing?” and then, “Go to SLEEP”!!  Well I NEVER.

Explaining my errand – seemed pointless by then – so back in bed I went and TRIED to get to sleep in my “propped up” bed.  It was then that I looked over at my sleepy husband – who never has ANY trouble sleeping – not even with a cold – or with all that snoring – and noticed that he looked….SMUG.  Yes – that’s it.  SMUG.  Maybe I would look like that too if I could sleep so much and be oblivious to noise.  HE never hears his noises in the night – and when I wake him to “move over” or “turn on your side” – requests – he is annoyed – because much of the time he will claim that he “isn’t even asleep yet.”  Yeah right – if I had a nickel….

So last night – not even his side was working – and Darth Vader came out in full force and there seemed to be NOTHING I could do about it.  Eventually I think I was tired enough that I just didn’t hear it anymore.

Well – that’s my sad sleep deprived story – and for the most part – everything I shared is entirely true – at least from my perspective 🙂

God Bless